How do you do it?
It’s funny, when we look at each other's lives, what we see and what we think are often a long way from the reality. Such as when you look across at your friend and you see that ‘she’s got it together’ or ‘wow, she is really enjoying life’. What you don’t see are the sacrifices she has to make and the struggles she faces each day. Because let’s face it, no one is perfect.
A few people have asked me recently “how do you do it?” Meaning how do I manage to show up for myself, my family and my business while (I am guessing here) making it look easy. Well I am going to share some of the behind the scenes of my life with you. Why? Because I want you to know and understand, life isn’t easy, we all face challenges but you too can live your life the way you want to.
The first thing I want you to know is that I am not special. I am not particularly smart or clever, I wasn’t top of anything at school - be it academic, arts or sport. I am your average friend. But I enjoyed school, I worked hard, I planned and I was disciplined not to leave things to the last minute.
Working hard is a large part of who I am, probably a lot to do with being a farmer's daughter! I work hard at everything I do, but don’t confuse working hard with working long hours. I don’t do long hours LOL! I manage my time and my energy to ensure that I am productive and get the best out of myself. I know I am at my best in the mornings, so I do the things I don’t find easy during this time and the more mundane and easy things in the afternoons. Knowing my energy flows is important to managing my time and productivity. I plan to have Friday’s away from work, this is my time to do errands, clean the house, catch up with friends and generally do things for me. I don’t do calls in the evenings, I would much rather get up earlier in the morning, but mostly because I find it hard to sleep if I’ve done a call in the evening. I block my diary for my daily walk, for weekly tasks, for things that are important that I don’t want to allow to slide. I go to bed at 9pm and read for 30 minutes, then sleep. We live next to a train line, the first train is at 5.30am and that’s my wake up call. I find managing my time and energy in these ways really helps me to achieve what I want in the time I allow.
When I’m working, that’s it, no distractions. I plan. At the end of each day I plan for the next day, at the end of the week I plan for the following week. By late November I’d already done a lot of my planning for the year ahead, although I do still have a few details to sort out. But because I plan, I know exactly what I’m doing when I’m working, I don’t waste time sitting, wondering what to do next.
I have bad days. Maybe I have a headache, maybe I get some bad news, or maybe things just don’t flow. On these days, I go easy on myself. I might take a longer walk with Minty and not sit at my desk for the full day. I might do some of the easier ‘work’ and leave the other stuff for tomorrow. I might step away completely, do some baking and come back to it tomorrow. I have been talking to the girls a lot over the summer, as they reach teen years the moods are becoming more pronounced, it’s Ok to feel off sometimes what’s important is to say “I’m just not feeling it today” and we can all go easy on each other. It’s made things a little smoother in our home, although it’s still a work in progress!
The past year working with my own coach has seen my confidence grow. I have more confidence in myself, in my role in the family, in my strengths as a coach, and generally in life. Confidence is key. If you are always doubting yourself, and yes I’ve been there too, then you’re not able to move forward. It takes time and energy to discover who you are and how you want to serve others, once you have that clarity though, your confidence will flourish. If you have been doubting yourself, check out my post from last week where I share some tips that might help you - https://www.theleaptolead.com/blog/is-it-time-for-a-soul-search.
Shit happens! Life is not simple and it’s not easy. When shit happens, I take a moment to pause, I go a little easier on myself, and I focus on the next right thing. What can I do? The floods in Auckland last week have been devastating, it meant that school couldn’t start for the new year until today. But I knew the start of the school year consumes more time than you think, so I had already recorded the summit (which goes live next week) prior to taking my Christmas break. Yes it meant I was working really hard at the end of the year, but thankfully I had, because there was chaos around here last week! With the chaos I could be flexible to spend time with the girls baking for our neighbours who were affected, we could do craft projects together, we danced and sang, we did loads of crazy stuff. I could because I had planned and because I knew the bare minimum I had to do and then I could be with the girls.
I am not special. I refuse to let life stop me. I have bad days. I have a positive attitude to life. I make mistakes. I use routines and planning to work for me. Because at the end of the day, it is about choices. I choose not to be a victim of circumstance. I choose to do life my way.
I wanted to share this, hopefully helpful, behind the scenes to my life because I want you to know that you too can do life your way. If you’re not sure what that means for you, that’s OK too. Take the time, do the soul searching and find your way.
If all this sounds like something you want to do for yourself, then I am excited to share that my coaching doors are open. I have 1 client spot still available starting this month and I invite you to join me.
If you truly want to live your life your way, feeling aligned and more confident in yourself, this is your time to show up!
Still not sure? This is what one client had to say "If you are wanting to achieve a goal but are unsure how to get there Emily has the insight, skills and professionalism to help you. She manages to break down the goal into bite size chunks from the beginning to the end goal in sight. At all times Emily is wise, helpful and very easy to talk to. She has the ability to clear away the clutter occupying your mind and make you see things more clearly. I highly recommend Emily, she has a real gift for helping people and always offers advice with compassion and kindness."
Book a free call with me today, and let’s see if one of my coaching packages is right for you - https://calendly.com/theleaptolead/coaching